How to Placate the Parents of the Bride and Groom
Sometimes it seems easier to just plan your wedding entirely on your own, right? No need to involve parents or friends; your wedding is just for you, isn’t it? That’s not always true though; at least not as far as your parents are concerned! You need guidance and a strong mother to support all of her own… I mean your decisions. Let’s not paint too bad a picture on parents though, shall we? After all, they did raise you and are only trying to do what they think is best for you. So how can we keep them happy but still get what we want for our wedding?
Keep Them All in the Loop
If you and your spouse have made some plans already, let your parents know. Nothing hurts our parents more than the thought of us keeping secrets from them; especially when the secret is about something so important to their children! If you let them know what’s going on, they will be much happier with the situation. The simplest means of placating your parents is by telling them exactly what, when, where, and how you plan to perform your wedding ceremony. So long as you answer all of those questions, most parents will remain at least somewhat content.
Stop and Listen
It’s only natural for parents to want, not only to know the plan, but also to be a part of the plan. They will, of course, wish to contribute to the decision making process, giving suggestions and guidance wherever they can. While in some circumstances this may actually be helpful, it is not uncommon for parents to complicate the wedding plan further. (Especially the mother of the bride!) Regardless of whether you agree with what your parents are asking of you or not, it is important that you stop and let them be heard. After you have allowed them speak, don’t ever just dismiss their ideas. Think about them. You never know when your Mum or Dad might actually come up with something great!
Balance Each Other’s Needs with Your Parents
It is essential that the two of you remain on the same page. So long as you know what each of you wants, you can compromise in such a way that you both have an equal share in the planning. The hard part is inputting your parent’s wishes on top of the compromise you’ve already made. While you can’t allow your parents to completely usurp your plans and take over everything, you can and should make some effort to incorporate their wishes into your wedding. The line does need to be drawn, but the worst mistake to make would be to draw the line right through them!
Most importantly over the time of wedding planning, keep close to your parents. It is easy enough to drift away while spending all your time pouring over plans with your soon to be spouse. Make time for your parents as well. Do this and you’ll be immensely surprised by the degree of love and support they will give you when the day arrives! Family is so important. Just remember, family is not just your spouse and children; family is everyone who loves and cares for you, as well as those who you love and care for. This is the greatest and sweetest gift on the planet! Cherish it!